Look Mom, I can fly!

Luke: Mom, if I pop my arms out like this, they turn into wings. That means I can fly off stuff.

Me: Really? Sounds cool, Luke.

Luke: Get your camera, Mom. I'll show you how I do it off the couch.

Me: OK.

To Infinity....AND BEYOND!!!!!!

Sea Monkeys and Such...

I was talking to my steppy sister, Meg, last night. I was telling her all of the many reasons I think she should start a blog. Her husband, Adam, asked her what exactly would she have to blog about.

They don't have kids.....yet.

I began thinking, and slapped myself with a new challenge. Find something other than my kids to blog about.

All morning I've been desperately searching for something interesting to share with you. As I stood at the kitchen sink, I stared intently at our Sea Monkeys. Have they been fed today? THAT'S IT!!! I'll blog about our gazillion Sea Monkeys!

Here goes.

Someone in this house (who shall remain nameless so as not to defeat the challenge), used $10.00 of his Christmas money (thanks, Pa John. Yes, they are saving the rest) to buy a complete Sea Monkey kit. By complete, I mean, this was a bargain! It came with the tank, instant Sea Monkey dust, Sea Monkey food, a travel watch to put a few of them in and take them places (yes, we have taken them on a road trip already), a food scoop, and directions. We came home, put the magic dust into the water, waited a few short days, and now on top of the dog and two fish (who I've tried to unsuccessfully kill for more than a year), we now own close to 100 Sea Monkeys.

So there you have it. A post without mentioning my you know what's. Now run off to the store (Target), and buy yourself a Sea Monkey kit.

Buyer BEWARE....the directions say in teeny tiny print.....Sea Monkeys can live up to 5 years.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

DR McKenzie, The GREAT!

Last week I took Logan and Wes for their well checkups. In case I haven't already told you, we have the best pediatrician in the world. Dr Mckenzie is amazing. She calls our house to check on the boys when they are sick. She has offered to babysit. (I'm not kidding) I have her HOME TELEPHONE NUMBER. Yes, although terrified to use it, I have her home telephone number. In times of desperation, I try to use it, but my fingers won't let me dial. I am terrified that my privileges may be revoked. Sometimes I open our address book just to make sure it's still there.

Back to my story.

Last week's appointment was enough to drive any mom to the brink. Wes and Logan each got 3 shots. Logan is at the age where he has come to the conclusion that going to the DR doesn't make his list of top ten fun things to do with your extra time. We were there for a long time and he became irritated, tired and claustrophobic. He wanted out. At one point he started hitting DR McKenzie.

Good times.

Towards the end of our stay, DR McKenzie looked at Jack (who was along for the ride), and had a heart to heart with him about potty training. Their conversation was short, sweet, and to the point. She told Jack that 3 year-olds use the potty. "No more diapers." she said. DR McKenzie also told Jack that she would be waiting for his phone call. She wanted him to leave her a message when he started to use the potty.

She promised to return his call.

As we drove home, Jack and I talked about his new mission. He asked me where his 'Big Boys' were. We got home and Jack picked a pair of big boy undies. Tomorrow was a new day. The boys had dinner and a bath and curled up in their beds. Jack curled up with his undies. While they were sleeping, the Diaper Fairy came and took all of Jack's diapers and left him skittles under his pillow.

(I knew I was saving the Halloween candy for a good reason)

Jack woke up a new man. He quickly reminded us of his discussion with "DR McKembzie". He took off his pull-up, and peed the Mississippi....IN THE POTTY. after a successful day, he left DR McKenzie a message. It went something like this: "Hi DR McKembzie, this is Jack. I goed pee pee and poo poo in the potty. Call me back."

The next day the phone rang. It was for Jack. As promised, DR. McKenzie was calling to congratulate him. He told her of his new-found success, and told her he loved her.

We all love her.

It's been almost 7 days now and Jack hasn't had one accident. He loves his new look. He proudly gazes at his new attire several times throughout the day. He likes to wear them backwards, because the opening in the front is "actually (his new word) a back pocket."

Derek and I are over the hump. Only two more to train. With the next two, we won't waste any time. Off to McKenzie's we shall go.

Her words are magic to my boys.

Real Men Don't Use Cups...

I've been losing sleep lately over a mystery that's taken place in our house.

Our dishwasher is bottom heavy.

Serious stuff, right?

The bottom racks are full of plates, bowls, and utensils galore. The top racks, however, remain virtually empty. (Aside from a few bottles, pacifiers, and my mug of choice for the day.) I've been searching for an answer for weeks. Last night, while doing dishes, I found my answer.

HERE IT IS:

Cups? We don't need no stinkin' cups!!!

Call Me Alfred...

BATMOBILE, SHMATMOBILE!

Today's Batman travels in a Suburban, and gives his Mommy a sense of protection

(every time she looks in the rear view mirror),

NO OnStar service or airbag can provide.

It's just how he rolls.

Simple Birthday Wishes...

Yesterday Evan went through the Sunday ads circling everything he wanted for his birthday with a bright blue sharpie.

He circled items any boy who's about to turn 8 would desire.

Rock Band for Wii, Tony Hawk Shoes, NFL Sweatshirts, etc.

Derek browsed through his birthday wishes and pointed these items from the

Walgreens ad out to me-

Oatmeal? What does this mean? Am I not feeding him enough?

Hot Tamales...YUMMMM! 3 for $3!! Both delicious and cost effective!

Now this one has me baffled. We have done all we can to raise our kids right. It breaks my heart to think he'd desire COKE for his birthday. This is strictly a PEPSI household. I may need Dr. Phil for help with this little issue.

Anyone know a good hypnotist?

Random Thoughts...

Whew. A new year. EXCITING!!! Exhausting.

Please allow me to rant. Here's what I'm thinking.....

I'm siting here staring at the boxes (and boxes) of Christmas ornaments and decorations that are taking up my entire dining room. I swear I've heard tiny voices coming from there the last few days. "Put us back. Can anyone hear us? Put us back! We want to go home to our rafters, high in your garage, where we'll be safe from misuse and disfiguration at the hands of your wild boys for the next 11 months. Please, put us back." (yes, hon, that was a hint thrown in just for you. I do hear voices, but they have nothing to do with Christmas decorations. Most of them come from miscellaneous items at Target. They say, "Put us back, you don't need us. We don't want to go home with you!" Then I throw them into the cart in order to shut them up. I can only take so much.) ANYWAY... Christmas is, above all, my favorite holiday. However, there is nothing quite like the enjoyment I receive when the decorations are down, and our house looks normal again. Well, as normal as a house with six boys can look, right? Right.

Where is this post going? I'm not sure. As I'm writing this, Logan has gotten out of bed 4 times now. Luke is sitting by my side, talking a mile per minute, And I've gotten up to change poops twice. Are those cookies in the oven burning? Be right back.....

Today I made the mistake of buying a bag of conversation hearts for the boys. Now my children are asking me where our Valentine's decorations are, and why they are not up. I tried to explain to them that it's a bit early, but I failed miserably. I think we'll put our ONE Valentine's Day decoration up tomorrow.

Last night Evan told me I was 'Prettier than Mike Ditka." In case you don't know what he looks like, here's a picture. Gee...Thanks, Ev.

Tomorrow morning I'm getting my hair cut. If the weather holds, I think I may camp out in front of the salon tonight. I'm that excited. I usually tell her she missed a spot, or complain (over and over again) about a certain area, just so it takes longer. And I wonder why my hair grows so slowly.....

We had an injury earlier in the week. Luke threw a book at Evan, causing one gusher of a nosebleed, and a possible broken nose. Poor Ev is pretty banged up. Our carpet in the front room resembles that of a crime scene. I'm doing my best, but this is some seriously-stubborn blood! Any suggestions?

Tonight is Friday Night Party Night and I have been reminded several times today that 'Friday Night Smackdown' will be the feature film. What ever happened to Lady And The Tramp, or The Wizard Of Oz? I'm so outnumbered. At least I get to pick the Friday night activity. I choose to go to Target to pick up the Epi-pens for Luke and Logan's newly-discovered nut allergy. (Did I mention they're also allergic to milk, soy, wheat, dogs and cats?)

I'm crossing my fingers they have their Valentine's stuff up and ready. Tonight, while my boys are busy learning new Smackdown moves, I'll be busy myself. Busy decorating for the next holiday. Valentine decorations their hearts desire-

Valentine decorations they shall receive.